


can i just be in my head with you

by em_o_lee



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Character Death In Dream, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, and they were roommates (oh my god they were roommates), i would like them to kiss, no one is actually dead, the blue gfs... they're in Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:15:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23206093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/em_o_lee/pseuds/em_o_lee
Summary: Jester has a bad dream, and a lot of words and feelings happen.
Relationships: Jester Lavorre & Beauregard Lionett, Jester Lavorre/Beauregard Lionett
Comments: 7
Kudos: 126





	can i just be in my head with you

**Author's Note:**

> Hi i'm em i'm 23 and i never fuckin learned how to read...... this is my first fic ever despite being in various fandom spaces for like 10 years... anyway enjoy!

The diamond on Beau’s chest explodes into glitter dust before disappearing, and Jester waits. She waits to watch Beau’s chest rise and fall again. Minutes, hours, days pass with Beau’s head propped on her knees. A twisted echo of Beau’s voice rings in her mind, saying, “You didn’t get there fast enough, Jessie, why didn’t you save me?” Jester struggles to move, feels hands pulling her away from Beau. She screams, hauling herself forward to shield her fallen friend…

Then jolts awake, chest heaving and sweat beading down her face despite the chilly weather.

Jester looks around, taking inventory of her surroundings. Sprinkle is asleep in his little nest next to her bed. Her bed and Beau’s are the same distance apart… Beau. Her eyes search for Beau… who is sitting up in her bed, wiping sleep out of her eyes with an alarmed look on her face. “Jessie? What’s up? You were talking in your sleep…” Beau’s brow furrows, and she swings her feet over the edge of her bed. “What’s got you all riled up, Jes?” She reaches a gentle hand across the divide between their beds, then gets up and pads over.

Upon closer proximity, Beau sees a tear glinting down Jester’s cheek in the slight light coming in through the window. “Jes…?”

Without warning, Jester throws her arms around Beau’s waist and pulls her close. She tucks her head with her ear resting on Beau’s stomach, hearing her heartbeat steady and true. Beau freezes for a moment before letting her arms come down to rest on Jester’s shoulders, hands crossing in the middle of her back. “I’m so sorry, Beau, I’m so sorry!”

Beau pauses then looks down at her darling blue friend and runs a hand down the back of her head, fingers sinking into the soft, dark blue waves and running downward. “Sorry for what, Jessie?” She leans away and lifts Jester’s head to look into her eyes. Her hands are squarely on the sides of her face, fingers split around the base of her horns, and she tries not to let that make her heart thud louder in her chest.

“I’m sorry for letting you fall and letting you get petrified and letting you almost die in Rexxentrum and--” Jester is cut off by Beau pulling her up into a full hug.

“You didn’t let anything happen, Jes. You saved me then, and when I got petrified. You were the first one I saw every time I came back. You save me every single time I go down, Jessie. Not Ducey, not Fjord. You.” She says that last word so softly against Jester’s shoulder and immediately worries that it acted as a confession. She tries not to pay attention to the way Jester’s hands are holding her waist, to the way her fingers feel ever-so-slightly cooler against her sides.

“Beau,” Jester breathes against her neck. “I don’t want you to die. I… Beau, I think I would die if you died.” She takes a deep breath and pulls back. Beau is looking at her, and she feels security from being held here, in this private moment between them. It’s almost like a scene out of one of the novels they read before bed, and that’s when it occurs to her. “Beau… is it okay if I kiss you?”

Beau’s eyebrows shoot up. If her eyebrows could leave her forehead and land on the moon, they would be hanging out on Ruidus with the moon shrimp or whatever that guy in Uthodern was studying. They would be gone for half the year if they could leave her face. She does not have the mind to respond, but apparently her body does, because she nods, feeling simultaneously like she did it herself and like it was an automatic response to Jester’s question. Then, she does.

Jester kisses her, and it’s better than she’s allowed herself to dream. It’s better than she could possibly imagine. It’s so soft and hesitant that Beau almost forgets to kiss back, but then she does, and it’s so wonderful. These incomparable feelings bubbling in her chest have reached a boiling point, and she feels like she could burst, like she could end up on Ruidus with her eyebrows.

But she doesn’t.

Jester pulls away and nudges Beau with her nose. “I’m not going to let anybody hurt you ever again, Beau,” she says, to which Beau gives a half-smile before sitting on the bed next to Jester.

“I don’t know if that’s possible, Jes, but I pity the fool your anger would be aimed at.” She pulls Jester up to her side under her arm and kisses the top of her head. “Do you want to share the bed tonight? I can fight your bad dreams for you.” Jester nods, moves, and pulls the blanket down so Beau can climb into bed next to her. They fall asleep facing each other, legs tangled together and Jester’s tail around Beau’s ankle. Jester sleeps fitfully for the first time in weeks.


End file.
